How to Leave your Comfort Zone?
Comfort zone can be defined as a situation where one feels safe and at ease, or a settled method of working that requires little effort and yields only barely acceptable results.
Your comfort zone could be an unhealthy habit, life situation or even a relationship. Deep inside you may feel that you should change something, but it is comfortable and way easier to stay in that familiar situation.
I totally get it. You might feel like you don’t have enough energy to make a change. You might fear change. You might even think that changing the situation is impossible.
I remember being in an unhealthy marriage when at some stage (being 7 months pregnant with my second child) I knew that we won’t be together. It was frightening and at that time I couldn’t even imagine how it is gonna be to live on my own with two small children. I promised myself that once I’ll have enough energy I’ll leave that comfort zone. What do I mean by saying a comfort zone? Definitely, it sounds strange to call a bad relationship a comfort, but for me, it was the routine, familiarity, financial comfort and social status etc.
I will not try to convince you that leaving your comfort zone is easy. Some decisions in life are very difficult and meaningful.
What helped me to leave my comfort zone?
I push myself regularly out of my comfort zones – leaving the unhealthy relationship, public speaking, talking to the camera or simply being more proactive in my daily life.
To make leaving your comfort zone easier, you should know where you are heading and why. Especially ‘why?’, this is a very important question. ‘Why?’ gives you real motivation. If you don’t know where you are heading, why would you make an effort and take actions?
I’ll give you some examples from my own life.
I knew that I wanted a peaceful home for my children, freedom to realize my dreams and possibly a healthy relationship in the future. Having that clear vision helped me to move on, even though I knew that it won’t be easy for me to start from zero with two small children.
The vision of the business I wanted to build helped me stay focused on studying and preparing myself every spare minute, instead of just relaxing with Netflix once my toddlers were asleep.
Knowing what I want to teach others and why massively helped me to push myself and I started talking to the camera almost every day on social media (check out my Instagram). Privately, I don’t talk too much and I’m rather quiet. I was always the one who listened to everyone else’s problems.
My point is, we are all different and we are struggling with different fears.
The truth is, that the distance between your dreams and reality is action. We cannot grow in life without changing and improving.
“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.”
– Brian Tracy
How to stay calm and strong when our life changes?
Developing your inner resilience comes over time and with practice. I often compare our inner strength to an invisible muscle. Unfortunately, you can’t take a before and after picture and post it on Instagram. You can feel your resilience and benefit from it in a time of change or hardship.
We all know and admire emotionally strong people – they always look for the bright side, trying to find deep meaning in everything they do, they don’t see themselves as victims no matter what happens to them and appear to ‘roll with the punches’.
Learning to be more resilient is, in fact, developing a set of skills. They may appear very subtle and fluffy, but they’re crucial to feel stronger and happier in life. Some of the inner resilience skills include practicing meditation/ mindfulness, gratitude, acceptance, compassion, self-care, developing confidence and calm. Our inner strength is developed with the change of perspective in life.
For me, improving your inner strength comes with finding the silence and calmness deep inside yourself. When you dedicate a few minutes every day to stay present, observe your breath, your thoughts and feelings with no judgment. In time, an amazing change of perspective will happen.
Finding that calmness inside you helps you deal with difficult situations and to move forward with your life.
Life gets interesting when you make a promise to yourself that from now on, you will push yourself out of your comfort zones on a daily basis, even if it’s a small action. If you’re shy, it might be starting a conversation. If you’re always talking too much, it could be pushing yourself to make the conversation equal and to truly listen to what the other person has to say.
Once you start your self-discovery journey you might find stepping out of your comfort zones really exciting.
Be brave and own your life. You’re in charge.
Be brave and own your life. You’re in charge.